I thought when I left my cooking job ten days ago, my life would become completely meta-physical. However, it turns out that its all about my body these days. It has finally dawned on me that it is important. I have spend my life dissociated, feeling as if my human form was a big anchor weighing me down, preventing me from being free. What I am discovering is that my body is much cooler than that, and it is a part of me, as I am a part of it, be it only for a lifetime. It is time for serious amends.
So, I would like to share a few of the body-awakening thoughts and experiences I have had this week.
Realization:
My body is the container for my Spirit during this lifetime. It is perfect, whole and complete. It is exactly the body I need to assist my Soul on Its path.
I have started Feldenkrais. It is a type of neuro-muscular re-education. Basically, it involves me lying on a mat, and making gentle movements with my body in ways it is not used to moving (which for my body, leaves a lot of room!). It is making me feel more aware of myself, and surprisingly more agile.
This new practice, has led me to walk differently. I used to go for a walk, and I would think to myself on the way up the hill, "Oh, I am so out of shape... I am so out of breath... I can't wait to get to the top of this hill... I am just not an athletic person... blah, blah, blah..." Now when I walk, I focus on the way my feet make contact with the Earth, the way my muscles feel as my legs are moving forward, what happens in my upper body as all this is happening below, and I focus on how my breath is entering and exiting my body. No judgement, just an observation. I get up that hill with so much less effort!
So, this week I have given up Sugar and Caffeine. I am detoxing. Irritable, hard to think straight, hyper-sensitive, hyper-critical... these are a few of the symptoms. But it is worth it. I want to be clear- headed and spiritually centered. That is my goal. In order to be a channel for my Highest Self, I feel like I want to be clean. To me that means letting go of the addictions which distract me from my path.
Yesterday, I observed my mind going straight from having a food craving to tranquilizing itself in the realm of fantasy. Any addiction will do! It made me feel instantly anesthetized, but that is not what I want, so I caught myself, and returned to reality. I do not want a quick fix, as pleasurable as the fix might feel at the time.
I am grateful for the skin I am in. It has brought me everywhere I have needed to go. I am committed to being integrated body, mind, and Spirit. I put a full length mirror in my bathroom, and I now stand before it in all my glory and tell myself, I love and appreciate you. It sounds hokey, but it feels really satisfying. As I was walking today, I thought, why not re-define myself as a physically fit person, why not embrace my beauty? This is my life, and I can define it however I choose. I no longer want to be stuck in my own limited view of myself.
I keep saying I am in the River, flowing with whatever feels like the next right thing. Today, a "random" encounter with a person whom I like, but haven't had much social contact with, led me to an invitation to actually jump in a real river and ride the current tomorrow afternoon. Sounds fun, but I am nervous. I haven't been swimming in a while. The water is pretty cold now. The current might be strong. But I am going for it, because really, it is just what I need and what I want. It is a tremendous gift. It will clear my head of all this incessant chatter. So into the river I go!!!
So good!
ReplyDeleteI feel I am walking along with you up the hill you described, more aware and appreciative of the gravel and stones underfoot and less attached to negative self descriptions. It is a spiritual journey and, for me, sharing the road with fellow travelers gives me happiness.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your openness
Is it true that REAL astrologers do not charge for their services as it is against the code to take profit out of a
ReplyDeletegift from God to help people?
I read this and saw a medium on tele say it in these circles it is donations given based on good work.
Is this true at all?
This is one point of view, and if this is what you believe, you should certainly honor it in your own life.
ReplyDeleteOur entire existence could be seen as a gift from God, all that we do and all that we are. This includes all of our abilities and all of our difficulties. I do not see astrology as a "gift" to be elevated above any other service. I used to be a chef, and I had the ability to bring people both joy and comfort through my craft. And, I needed to make a living. Practicing astrology is no different. I work very hard at it, and I have spent a great deal of time and money on my education (although, even if I hadn't, I still should be able to make a living at it if that is what I am meant to do).
It is an interesting question you pose. And one I have considered. One thing I can tell you is that I have given a lot of reading away for free, and they usually don't seem to go as well as the ones people pay for. I think that when people pay, they are valuing themselves and me on a different level, and that changes the energy of the reading.
Thanks for your question. I wish you peace.